Missing My Heat Appliances

It doesn't happen often, and I don't frequently get the urge, but today, I am just longing to use some of my favourite heat appliances.

There are so many beautiful photos of women with loose, beachy waves that are so popular these days, and I would just love to have that look.

The only way I could really attain that though would be to use a large-barreled curling iron, or use a technique with a straightening iron that I've seen done. I also have a triple-barreled curling iron that gives lovely waves.

I am not one of those people who thinks it's sacrilege to use heat appliances. While I have written at length about just why heat appliances are damaging to hair, I don't think that there's anything wrong with people using them, as long as they are making an informed choice. Plus, some people have strong hair that can withstand heat styling better than others.

Unfortunately, I know I can't have it all. I've already made an informed choice to dye my hair, knowing that no matter how much care I put into my hair, there is no way it will ever be as healthy and strong as if I didn't dye it.

Given that I do colour my hair, I really can't risk the additional damage that heat-styling would cause.

When I used to heat style, I would often have split ends even at shoulder length. Right now, I don't have even one split end.

Yet, I am just itching to pull out a curling iron right now and style my hair into the loose, sexy waves that only hot irons can produce.

Yes, I can create a type of curl with sponge rollers, and I do know of ways to create waves with bandannas, braids and pin curls, but the outcome isn't as easy to control as it is with heat appliances. Also, there is instant gratification with heat styling.

However, I'm wearing my hair down, and even though it was washed yesterday, it looks as lovely and shiny as freshly washed hair. And there are no annoying splits for me to obsess over.

So I guess my curling irons will stay in the drawers and cupboards where they've been for over four years now. As much as I'm craving those beachy waves, I know that I would regret it if I started giving in to heat styling. I should count myself lucky that my hair is as good as it is considering that I dye it.

Perhaps instead, I'll do some sleuthing for yet more new methods of creating waves without heat. If I discover anything exciting, I'll be sure to share it here--with photos, of course.

'Til tomorrow, my friends. Much love to all, and extra hugs to anyone feeling ill today.
xo

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October BSL Update: I'M THERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well, I mentioned yesterday that I was nervous about taking a BSL update photo, but I did it anyway. (Photo clickable as always)

I am well and truly at BSL now!!!

Yes, my ends look a bit thin, but we knew that, as I've mentioned ad nauseam that I'm still trimming out the damage that I did over 2 years ago. I still have a few inches to trim off.

But I'm at BSL again for the first time in almost 2 1/2 years, and I couldn't feel happier about it. Since I skipped my trim in September, because I was getting so close to BSL, and of course I haven't trimmed in October, I now feel free to have that much-needed trim, and I'll be able to feel good about it. I'm going to get back into my "trim 1/2 inch every 3 months routine" now, until I reach waist length, which even with the trims, should be next summer.

I really do feel so happy to know that my hair has been getting longer this year after maintaining between just below shoulder length and BSL for almost 2 years.

So, while I won't deny that my damaged ends still bother me, I will say that for today at least, it's a very good hair day for me.

'Til tomorrow, my friends. Much love to all, and extra hugs to anyone feeling exhausted today.
xo

Lack of Sleep, PMS and Damaged Hair Don't Mix

Sunday evening already! Where did the weekend go? It was rainy all morning and cloudy and cool all day. Today was the very first time that the house was just a touch chilly when I woke up. Not chilly enough to put on the heat, but chillier than I've been used to.

I slept a bit longer last night--until 4:58 a.m. That was just not enough to make up for my sleep deficit, and I have PMS. Not a good combination.

I did that lovely deep coconut oiling yesterday, with wonderful results. I love that the oil can be washed out with conditioner. It never ceases to amaze me how well conditioner cleans hair. In any case, my hair feels soft and lovely.

However. I have to admit that I've been obsessing again today about my thin, damaged ends. I honestly don't know how bad it looks to any of you, but I can tell you that I can really feel it.

When I pull my hair into a ponytail and slide my hand down, there is not a gradual taper. There is a very abrupt point where the hair palpably gets thinner.

I swear if it weren't for you all who read this, I may have given in to temptation and chopped off enough hair today to get rid of those last few thin inches.

I am so fortunate to be accountable to you who read my words, as well as to my family. It makes giving in to hormonal whims more difficult.

So, crisis has been averted, and I won't chop. But I have to admit to you that I wanted to.

Finding that balance between cutting out damage and still allowing my hair to grow is very difficult at times, and today was particularly hard.

I just have to remember that I cannot expect perfection. No one is perfect and my hair doesn't have to be perfect either.

Thank you all who read my blog. You all help me more than you'll ever know.

I hope that you all had a great weekend, and I wish you a happy week ahead.

Love to all. 'Til tomorrow, my friends.
xo

Baby Shampoo Is For Babies--Seriously

I can't tell you how many times I've heard people either in real life or on the hair forums mention that in an effort to be gentler to their hair they have decided to use baby shampoo.

Now, I understand the reasoning; if the shampoo is gentle enough for a baby, then it should be mild and gentle on the hair, right?

Wrong.

Baby shampoos are generally "no more tears" or "tear-free". Now let's think about it. Tears are salty. That means they are alkaline. So in order for a substance not to sting the eyes, it has to be alkaline.

Our hair and skin likes a more acidic pH. This is why so many people like to use a rinse of water with a mild dilution of vinegar, lemon, or citric acid. It keeps the cuticle of the hair closed and shiny. Our scalp and skin also depends on an acid mantle to protect us from dryness, flaking and certain bacteria. Most adult shampoos these days do indeed have a slightly acidic pH level.

So in truth, while baby shampoo is gentle for babies, it's really in the sense that it does cleanse the hair, but does not cause them undue pain. It's the baby's comfort that is the concern. The shampoo is not made to keep a baby's hair in optimum health.

Using baby shampoo, especially repeatedly, will cause the cuticle of the hair to open. This results in weaker, rougher hair, and also in hair that will not hold in moisture. Ultimately it results in damaged hair. Once hair is really damaged, we all know that it can't be repaired. It can be improved, but never repaired.

The bottom line is that baby shampoo really is meant only for babies. It's not meant to be used to promote healthy long hair. While it is gentle on one's eyes, it is very harsh on the hair.

'Til tomorrow, my friends. Much love to all and extra hugs to anyone in pain.
xo

Protecting Hair From Ponytail Breakage

I received an interesting question from a new reader, asking how to prevent or minimize the breakage at the nape that can occur when wearing ponytails frequently. I know that many people perpetually have some shorter hairs at the nape, so I thought it would make a good discussion.

First of all, a lot of us find that we have short hairs or flyaways around the nape, and it's not necessarily due to breakage. Many of us have "baby hairs" at the nape that have a very short terminal length. I know that I have some, and I've always had them, no matter what the length of my hair. I rarely have ever worn ponytails either. This could be what you're experiencing. 

Some people also have the same type of baby hairs at the temples or on either side of the forehead. Again, that's usually not breakage, it's just an area of the head that often has a very short terminal length and also you may notice that the hairs are finer than on the rest of your head.

However, if you really are experiencing breakage due to wear and tear from ponytail ties, there are a few things you can do.

Obviously, the simple answer is not to wear ponytails frequently, (as you said yourself). I know that is easier said than done. Ponytails can be so handy.

Even no-damage elastics will wear away at the hair if worn in the same place day after day. One thing you might try is varying the placement of your ponytail. One day wear it low, the next wear it high, another day wear the ponytail in the middle of the head. Then try wearing a side ponytail. As long as the same hairs aren't put into contact with the ponytail tie in the exact same position day after day, you won't be stressing the hair as much.

As well, you may want to look into alternative hair ties. Many people make their own hair ties from cutting circular strips from nylon pantyhose or stockings. The good thing about that is that hosiery comes in so many colours. Aside from the usual flesh-toned shades, you can find black, white and other shades that don't end up looking like hosiery when it's in your hair.

Silk or satin scrunchies are excellent as well, and cause minimal friction.

Yet another thing to remember is not to pull the hair too tightly before putting it into a ponytail.

I think the best idea though, is to learn some quick and easy hairstyles that contain your hair without damage. Braids are a great option, and of course there are a lot of buns that are easy to do. Ponytails are still fine, but try to really minimize how often you wear them.

If anyone has any other ideas, I'd love to hear them.

I would like to say hello and welcome, PassionKiller, and thank you so much for the comments you left today.

'Til tomorrow my friends. Much love to all.

xo

Peroxide In Permanent Boxed Hair Dye

Well, okay, AutumnLeaves, I guess I'll accept "lots of hair" as something good about your hair. You also asked me a really good question about when and how the damage that I talk about my hair having, actually occurred. Did it occur when I dyed it brown, or when I dyed it back to blonde a year later? Well, the answer is both.

When I started my long hair journey, my hair was about 2 inches or so shorter than it is right now. I had just stopped using heat products on my hair, but my hair was already somewhat damaged from using them. If I knew then what I know now, I would have concentrated on a growing/trimming plan that would have had me gaining length, while getting rid of damage.

However, back then, I just wanted length, and I didn't even want a trim.  I wanted every bit of growth I had to show.  After a year, I was at about waist length, and my ends were pathetically thin from breakage, but not as bad as some hair I've seen.  Nevertheless, I wouldn't allow my hair to get into that state with the knowledge that I have today.

I really did have to learn my lesson about quality over quantity.

I got a very quick lesson when I got a bee in my bonnet about dyeing my hair medium brown. I don't to this day know why I just had to do it, but I really wanted to see what it felt like to have brown hair. For some reason,  put aside my age and the resulting changing skin tone, and the fact that my roots were almost snow white. If I had really thought about all of that I wouldn't have dyed it, but sometimes a gal just has to try something new, and an army can't stop her (me).

The medium brown hair dye did damage my hair. Worse was the fact that I had to dye it a second time, because the colour didn't take evenly throughout my hair. So I dyed with medium brown over all of my hair not once but twice. Remembering that the last several inches of my hair had already been dyed blonde to cover my grey, and had been regularly heat-styled, you will realize that my hair was already fragile, and in no condition to use a full head dye even once, never mind twice.

I know that when we think about peroxide in permanent box dye that we purchase in the drugstore or grocery store, we often think of the peroxide being only in blonde colours.  We know that ammonia is in all permanent drugstore dyes, however, often we forget that peroxide is in all such dye whether light blonde or jet black.

Don't forget that regular permanent box dye only will lighten hair by about 2 shades.  If your hair is naturally black, you will be able to go to medium brown with box dye, if dark blonde naturally, you could go to light blonde from dark blonde. In my case I'm adding colour to hair that predominantly has none.  To do that, peroxide and ammonia are also necessary.

Peroxide does lighten hair, but it also opens the cuticle of the hair shaft so that the dye can be deposited.  Hence, the permanence of the dye.

So yes, even black permanent dye does contain peroxide.  That's why people who have greys will not get any sort of lasting coverage from products that do not contain peroxide and/or ammonia.

There I was, almost at waist length, a year into my long hair journey. After dyeing twice with the medium brown, my hair felt like straw, almost as though it had been bleached.  It wouldn't have been so bad if my hair was already in tip-top condition, but as I said before, it had already been previously dyed and heat treated.

I cut 6 inches off my hair at that time. I definitely cut out the worst of the damage, and that's when I started my plan of growing but cutting off 1/2 inch quarterly.

It didn't take me long though, to realize that I was fooling myself by thinking that the brown hair looked anything like natural on me, and I had to touch up my roots so often that it wasn't even funny.

However, I knew that if I lightened it back to blonde, I would inflict severe damage on my hair. That kept me dying it brown for close to another year. My hair was looking good though with my new trimming plan and the new hair care that I had discovered.

There I was though, two years into my long hair journey, closer to waist than to BSL, and I knew that I absolutely had to get rid of the brown.  It was not flattering to my face, it required constant touch-ups, and most importantly, it just wasn't me.

I did the best I could do with honey lightening, over the course of a couple of months, but there was only so much I could do to lighten my hair. When it was finally light enough that I was comfortable with trying to dye it blonde again, I could not achieve the blonde I wanted right away. There was too much orange in my hair, causing a brassiness. I can't believe I did it and still had any hair left, but I had to lighten my hair two more times in order to get my old blonde shade back.

Needless to say, my hair was damaged yet again, only much worse than before.  Now I had breakage as well.  I had to cut off another six inches, and then again 3 years into my long hair journey; a year ago, I cut off yet another six inches. With all of the trims I've had in between, I've just about cut off as much hair as I've grown in the past four years.

All of that major dyeing took place before I learned that coconut oil could help to lessen peroxide damage.  For almost two years, I have been using coconut oil on the length of my hair before touching up my roots, and I am convinced that it does help reduce damage. However, I must say that just because it seems to work for me does not mean it will work for anyone else who reads this, but I will add that if you're going to colour your hair anyway, a pre-oiling with coconut oil certainly can't hurt, unless you're allergic to coconut oil.

As I've said before, there will be no more six inch chops in my future. I'm only trimming off about a quarter of my growth every three months, which still gives me six inches of growth per year.

So that's the full story on my damage, and a reminder that all permanent box dyes have peroxide.

Well, my hair did indeed enjoy the deep treatment yesterday, and I hope to be back tomorrow with my progress report for August.

Love to all.

Not Quite As Cheerful As I'd Hoped

I really wanted to be more chipper and cheerful when I wrote today, but it's just not happening. I still have a migraine and that summer cold as well as hot flashes, and I feel like a bear with a thorn stuck in its paw.

I'm not feeling as impatient about my hair today as I was yesterday, but I'm not feeling great about it either.  AutumnLeaves, wouldn't you think we'd have learned our lessons by this age?

I do want to say hi and thank you to Linda, a new reader who left some lovely comments on my website.  Your kind words cheered me up, and we can all learn  to be patient together.

I've mentioned before that I used to use cone-free products, but that I am now using cones (products with silicones) on my damaged ends. I really like the conditioners that I've been using, but I tried another one yesterday that made my ends feel as if they're made of plastic. This is not helping me feel any better about those damaged ends.  I don't know whether it was a one-time thing with this conditioner or if I need to clarify and perhaps that's the problem. I have used this conditioner in the past, but I don't recall my hair feeling this way after using it.

I will be trying the conditioner again, but I do have to say that the last few inches of my hair feel like Barbie hair.  It's really not a good feeling. I'll go back to the usual conditioners and give this one another try at a later date.  It really could be other factors that is causing my hair to feel this way. We'll see.

It's going to be quite a while until I'll be able to go cone-free again, but I'm not minding it too much ordinarily. If I try to go completely cone-free now, I'd have so many tangles on the ends, and my hair would feel so rough. It's just not worth it to me.

With the heat and the humidity, as well as the hot flashes that I'm experiencing, I just can't say enough how happy I am that my hair is long enough to put up and keep off my neck. I'm not wearing it in any way fancy, but it's up and out of the way. I don't know how I would cope if I had hair on my neck during hot flashes.

On another note, they say that a mother is only as happy as her least happy child.  I believe that to be true. I won't say much, but I will say that one of my kids is going through a trying time.  It's only temporary, and it's not health-related, thank heaven, but it's a trying time nonetheless. I truly hope things get better very quickly.

Well, I guess that's about as much babbling as I dare do today.

Love to all.  'Til tomorrow my friends.

Blow Drying

Blow drying can really impede the healthy growing of long hair.  Of course every head of hair is different, and some hair types can withstand blow drying more than others.

However, generally speaking blow-dryers need to be used with caution.  

My own personal experience with giving up heat styling in general has resulted in a difference like night and day with my hair.  In my heat styling days, I would frequently have many split ends when my hair was not yet shoulder length.  My hair is at least 8 inches longer than that now, and I don't yet have a split end.  I imagine that as my hair gets longer again, splits will be inevitable, but right now, I am split-free.

There are reasons why heat is so dangerous that people don't sometimes don't take into consideration. If your blow dryer is blowing air hot enough to burn your skin, you know it's hot enough to scorch your hair.  Skin heals.  Hair doesn't.  It will likely fray, then break off at the scorching point.

Too often people will put a hot dryer much closer to their hair than they would to their skin because obviously, your hair doesn't have nerves that could tell you, "ouch".  If the blow dryer is too hot to use 6 inches away from your skin, then you can bet that it is too hot for using 6 inches from your hair.

Does this mean that under no circumstances can you use a blow dryer on your hair?   That is not realistic for everyone, I well know.  There will always be a time that you may need to use a blow dryer if the weather is cold and you have a wet head.

The key to using a blow dryer when necessary is to make sure that you have absorbed as much water from your hair as possible with an absorbent towel.  When you use the blow dryer use a warm or cool setting (not hot) and hold the dryer well away from the hair.  Do not attempt to dry your hair 100%.  Stop the blow drying before it's absolutely dry.  If you keep blow drying when your hair is already completely dry, you will dry your hair out far more than necessary.

Also, I know that many people have slightly wavy hair and blunt bangs.  It's okay to tame them with a round brush and a blow dryer, but again, don't use a hot setting.  A warm setting, finished by a blast of air will do the trick.  While you may not be concerned with damaging your bangs, as they are trimmed so often, you never know when you may want to grow them out.

So the bottom line is to use common sense.  And as with everything, moderation is the key.

The Silicone Debate

A lot of people don't realize that most hair products contain silicones.  There is a lot of debate as to whether using silicone-containing products is good for the hair or not.

There are benefits to silicones and there are drawbacks.  Having an informed opinion, and knowing how to care for your hair if you use silicones is very important.

Silicones do provide a lot of slip to hair, and prevent tangles very well.  They can provide shine, smoothness and they seal in moisture.  They can also help hide chemical damage and split ends.

The downside is that they also seal moisture out, and they do create buildup.  Eventually, this can lead to dull hair and potential breakage.

So if you feel that silicone products are beneficial for you, here are some tips on how to prevent problems down the line.

1.  Clarify hair.  I wrote an entry on April 9, 2010 that explains how to clarify your hair.

2.  Do a deep moisture treatment with a non-silicone based moisturizing conditioner.  I described a good moisturizing treatment in that same April 9, 2010 entry.

3.  When that is rinsed out, use the silicone-based conditioner of your choice.  There are also many smoothing and shining serums that contain silicones as well.

4.  Periodically, repeat the clarifying and deep moisture treatment process.  This will prevent the hair from damaging buildup, dullness and dryness that can occur with regular silicone usage.


I myself was on a regimen of non-silicone based products for about 2 years.  After dying my hair from dark brown back to blonde, I incurred damage that still remains in the last several inches of my hair.  It will be some time before it's all trimmed out. So I do use silicones now, and will likely until the damage is gone.

Most hair products these days have a full list of ingredients on the bottle.  Here is a comprehensive list, compiled by Nightshade from the Long Hair Community, of most of the most common silicones that are found in hair products.

There is no right or wrong when it comes to silicones.  It's all about what works for you and your hair, and knowing how to care for your hair if you use them.

Wishing everyone a wonderful Earth Day!