Well, one of the missing hair accessories turned up, hurray! However, it was the most easily replaceable of the lot of missing hairtoys. It is really the two pairs of Mei Fa Hairstyx that was getting to me, but finding the hair fork gave me renewed hope that the hair sticks will eventually be found. It may take months or years, but one of these days they’ll turn up.
I still wonder what it is that makes things like that drive me so crazy at times. Other times, I would shrug it off. This time, I was like a madwoman. Thankfully, I’ve gotten over the obsession and I’m just going to forget about the missing objects and concentrate on the things I do have in my life.
I suspect that sometimes those obsessive moments have something to do with the fact that I’m past perimenopause and I’m now pre-menopausal. There’s no question in my mind that the changes in hormones have a great deal to do with moods and emotions.
As I approach my fifties, I think often about who I wanted to be at this age. I had hoped that by the time I hit my late forties, that I would be more mellow, and take things in stride a bit more.
While it’s true that some things are of little importance to me anymore, I still do sweat the small stuff at times, and I really want to learn to let those things go, so that I can concentrate on what’s really important.
There really are a lot of things I like about being older. I no longer feel compelled to follow the latest trends in clothing, hair or makeup. I wear what I like, and I’m good with that.
I notice that I am far more understanding of what I perceive as people’s failings than I was as a young woman. I’ve grown to realize that when I meet a stranger who is in a bad mood, there may well be a very good reason why that person is unhappy. It’s finally sunk in to me that everyone carries burdens, and naturally, sometimes it affects their behaviour. It doesn’t make them a nasty person; it could be someone who has just had some really bad news, or perhaps someone mourning a loved one.
I guess I’ve learned to give people the benefit of the doubt more.
What I do not so much enjoy about getting older is starting to notice some changes in my body such as my face beginning to sag. I was just talking to a friend about this today.
Once in a while I catch a glimpse of myself with a neutral expression. Sometimes it will be an accidental photo taken when I forget to set the timer. It’s been quite a shock to see that what used to be a blank expression now looks like an angry expression, as my mouth turns down at the corners a bit now. Gravity, I guess.
I see the beginnings of jowls, and I don’t care for that much either. However, smiling takes care of all of that, so there’s a good reason to smile more.
I do notice that I’ve had to change my makeup application a great deal in the past few years. It’s really interesting how makeup that looked good at 38 just looks wrong at 48. Yet it’s not too hard to adapt. I just had to use common sense and reassess my cosmetic application.
All in all, it seems as though the things that I find somewhat unpleasant about ageing are merely the superficial things.
I hope that with more age, I continue to gain some wisdom. There really does have to be an upside to this aging thing. Wisdom, I’ll happily take.